Weary
This week has been... weird. I can't quite describe it. I guess I'm just off my game, and I don't know why. Here are a couple of examples:
1) I volunteered to bake brownies for Awards Night for my youth orchestra Monday evening, and just as I was about to start making them I remembered that we are out of baking cocoa... and so I had to bring store-bought cookies.
2) The next morning, the girls and I went to visit our dear friends who have a new baby at the hospital. It was pretty cold out, which I didn't realize before we stepped out of the house to get in the car. I pulled the car back around so I could run in and get the diaper bag and jackets for the girls. I got the diaper bag, and a jacket for myself, but somehow I forgot jackets for the girls. They both had to endure about a 1/4 mile walk from our car to the hospital in the freezing cold, spitting rain, with short-sleeve shirts on.
Little things like this have been going wrong all week, and I can't figure out what is wrong with me. Maybe it's just one of those weeks, and yes, they are just "little things." But I can't help feeling like a terrible mother when things like this start to add up. Not to mention the fact that our kitchen floor is filthy, the bathrooms haven't been cleaned in a month, and my husband had to do four loads of laundry last night because I just haven't been able to get to it. We had to skip library story time this morning so that I could go grocery shopping for the week (which I normally do on Monday). I don't know where the time is going (besides into my blog) and why I can't seem to get organized. I feel like I'm in a fog.
My sleep (quality and quantity) hasn't been great, but that's nothing new.
Yesterday I sat down for a quick blogging break (which usually involves reading some blogs and writing some blogs) and I happened upon these two encouraging blog posts. I thought I would share them, since at least some of my readers are mothers. And even if you're not a mother or you're not in the process of mothering at the present moment, I think these are worth a read for any overwhelmed person, although they are written from the perspective of women who are mothers.
I have been reminded of my need for help beyond my own power. I need earthly help and earthly rest, yes, but these things won't satisfy unless I also seek heavenly help and heavenly rest. This is the only way to escape that "hamster on a wheel" feeling. I guess mothers who can't find that kind of help are tempted to just quit. But I don't want to quit. I want to feel like I'm doing my job well. So... I guess I just need to stop feeling like a failure, turn things over to the Lord, and move on.
Hopefully my week will turn around. And if it doesn't, well... hopefully I won't beat myself up too badly over it.
1) I volunteered to bake brownies for Awards Night for my youth orchestra Monday evening, and just as I was about to start making them I remembered that we are out of baking cocoa... and so I had to bring store-bought cookies.
2) The next morning, the girls and I went to visit our dear friends who have a new baby at the hospital. It was pretty cold out, which I didn't realize before we stepped out of the house to get in the car. I pulled the car back around so I could run in and get the diaper bag and jackets for the girls. I got the diaper bag, and a jacket for myself, but somehow I forgot jackets for the girls. They both had to endure about a 1/4 mile walk from our car to the hospital in the freezing cold, spitting rain, with short-sleeve shirts on.
Little things like this have been going wrong all week, and I can't figure out what is wrong with me. Maybe it's just one of those weeks, and yes, they are just "little things." But I can't help feeling like a terrible mother when things like this start to add up. Not to mention the fact that our kitchen floor is filthy, the bathrooms haven't been cleaned in a month, and my husband had to do four loads of laundry last night because I just haven't been able to get to it. We had to skip library story time this morning so that I could go grocery shopping for the week (which I normally do on Monday). I don't know where the time is going (besides into my blog) and why I can't seem to get organized. I feel like I'm in a fog.
My sleep (quality and quantity) hasn't been great, but that's nothing new.
Yesterday I sat down for a quick blogging break (which usually involves reading some blogs and writing some blogs) and I happened upon these two encouraging blog posts. I thought I would share them, since at least some of my readers are mothers. And even if you're not a mother or you're not in the process of mothering at the present moment, I think these are worth a read for any overwhelmed person, although they are written from the perspective of women who are mothers.
I have been reminded of my need for help beyond my own power. I need earthly help and earthly rest, yes, but these things won't satisfy unless I also seek heavenly help and heavenly rest. This is the only way to escape that "hamster on a wheel" feeling. I guess mothers who can't find that kind of help are tempted to just quit. But I don't want to quit. I want to feel like I'm doing my job well. So... I guess I just need to stop feeling like a failure, turn things over to the Lord, and move on.
Hopefully my week will turn around. And if it doesn't, well... hopefully I won't beat myself up too badly over it.
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